The secret vice of the model spouse

The other day I felt very tired in the evening. A slight headache made me even more irritable, so as not to annoy my hardworking man and to spoil his well-deserved hours of rest, I decided to go to early. “Good night, sweetheart!”, “Sleep well, darling!”, Kisses left and kisses right, and he sat with a glass of wheat beer alone in front of the TV.

My husband is the dream image of a spouse, and you can not praise him enough in the family circle and before visiting. He is intelligent, has the pleasing look of a sportsman and the necessary amount of hair on his chest to attract the attention of curious women out in the street. He likes to help in the household. Shopping and washing dishes are his hobby. He does not smoke, is not a drinker, and even though he is middle-aged, he still does not have a beer belly. The latter is my secret pride, because this has rarity among the German men. V., the dear friend in the distant homeland, who has for a long time been envying me for my domestic happiness, has often tried to discover a hidden vice with my husband. To this day, however, she has remained unsuccessful in her efforts. ”

So I left that evening my treasure calmed down and devoted myself to the preservation of their own well-being. After fifteen years together, I knew with certainty that he was not to be shocked. He would drink his good beer, eat some cheese or sausage snacks, watch the daily topics, maybe read a little or leaf through a magazine and then – go to bunk. Everything is very normal. And since I’m not a friend of pill swallowing, I made myself a fragrant St. John’s wort tea, allegedly calms the nerves and brought him to the bunk. A light reading should also help to get me gradually into the realm of dreams. This familiar recipe had always worked. Just not on this evening. I read one story after another, drank five cups of soothing tea and became increasingly alert. A tiny little man with thin legs fidgeted in my brain, scratching and tugging, never letting me get tired. By 23.00 o’clock the unrest had increased so much that I could not stand it in bunk anymore. I slipped into my slippers, pulled on my light dressing gown, and carefully opened the door to the living room. “Well, if the tea does not help, I’ll just try it with a glass of wine in the company of my sweetheart,” I thought. By midnight, the unrest had increased so much that I could not stand it in bunk anymore. I slipped into my slippers, pulled on my light dressing gown, and carefully opened the door to the living room. “Well, if the tea does not help, I’ll just try it with a glass of wine in the company of my sweetheart,” I thought. By midnight, the unrest had increased so much that I could not stand it in bunkanymore. I slipped into my slippers, pulled on my light dressing gown, and carefully opened the door to the living room. “Well, if the tea does not help, I’ll just try it with a glass of wine in the company of my sweetheart,” I thought.

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The treasure sat as expected in his chair with his back to me and read something. “Darling, I absolutely can not fall asleep”, I whispered and wanted to ask permission to sit with him. He looked up startled, his face turning red in a matter of seconds, he quickly closed a thick newspaper and threw it on a flat object on the low coffee table. The empty beer glass fell down and a small irregular dark spot formed on the light carpet.

“But what is it?” I stuttered in surprise. “Am I disturbing you?” The catalog of an erotic shop with sample samples on the last page – my husband had just studied – slid slowly from the edge of the table and fell with light slap on the beer stain. A large, almost empty box of chocolates lay there, speaking volumes. I became quite confused, my face paling, and a slight tingling in my fingers already announced a threatening fainting for the next moment. My sporty, efficient and exemplary model spouse, darling of his mother-in-law and many women’s eyes, ate chocolate! In quantities!!! In my mind’s eye, a heavy, diabetic male appeared with slick, round cheeks, bad teeth, and foul-smelling bad breath. His stomach bulged over the pants, bobbing, two buttons missing at the bottom of his shirt. The man smacked with chocolate-glued lips and reached out to stroke me. A nightmare!

But suddenly I had to yell loud and far. The shock had an unexpected effect, and I was suddenly drowsy. The fatigue finally subsided with a force over me that I could not resist. With soft knees, I turned around, leaving my husband to the consequences of his weak character and went slowly back to the room, there to meet the needs of nature

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