A young lady is working at an old people’s home when she walks into an old gentleman’s room. He’s holding a set of photographs and looks upset. “What’s the matter?” She asks “I’ve got no-one to pass these onto to when I go”. Says the old man, looking at his […]
There is this man who meets a fairy. He is granted three wishes. Having wished for his most urgent needs the man uses his third wish to ask the fairy to return and give him three more wishes. The fairy complies and says: “You can call me whenever you want.” […]
A brunette who really hated blondes was walking through the desert when she came across a magic lamp. After rubbing the lamp the genie told her that she got three wishes with one catch: All the blondes in the world would get twice whatever she asked for. So the brunette […]
A man comes home after his regular Saturday golf game and his wife asks why he doesn’t include Joseph in the games anymore. The husband asks, “Would you want to play with a guy who regularly cheats, swears up a storm over everything, lies about his score, and has nothing […]
A man and his ever nagging wife went on vacation in Jerusalem. The woman kept complaining about every little detail and making the trip unbearable. But a few days before their vacation ended, a tragic accident ended the woman’s life.The undertaker told the husband, “You can have her buried here […]
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, “Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?” The husband says, “What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?” A few days […]
There are three women. One is dating, one is engaged, and one is married. They decide to get kinky with their men and really pull out all the stops to make it extra special. The woman who is dating says, “Okay, so I bought black leather, red lipstick, fishnet stockings, […]
A man was invited to a wedding. When he reached the hotel, he found two doors written on them… Bride relatives groom relatives He entered the groom door and found two doors again. Ladies MenHe entered men door and found two doors again. People with gifts People without gifts He […]
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?” “Sixteen,” the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. “How do you know that?” “Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have […]
An elderly couple was having dinner at another couple’s house. After their meal, the wives went into the kitchen. The two elderly gents were talking, and one says, “Last night we went out to a fabulous new restaurant that I’d highly recommend.” The other man says, “What’s the name of […]
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll […]
A man noticed his credit card has been stolen – but he never reported it because the thief was still spending considerably less than his wife. What is yellow and can’t swim? An excavator. Did you find it funny? No. Neither did the excavator operator.
A man approaches a very beautiful woman in the supermarket and says, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?” asked the beautiful woman. To which the man replied, “Because every time I talk to a beautiful […]
