Husband approaches his wife, “Jenny, I think I have a problem.” Jenny smiles at him kindly, “Darling, your problems are my problem also. Trouble shared is trouble halved. Tell me.” “OK, “ says the husband, “in that case, we got the neighbor pregnant.”
Wait for me honey, I’m just finishing my make-up. You don’t need make-up, Jane. Oh, Richard…. really? That is so sweet of you! You need plastic surgery.
but unfortunately they had a car crash and died. Before the gates of St Peter they stood thinking maybe they could get married in heaven. So they ask St Peter, and Peter says ”Well it’s quite rare, but let me see what I can do.” So St Peter goes into […]
As is tradition in Italian families, Marol spends her wedding night in her family home. Her mother sleeps in the adjacent room in case Marol has any questions. Mama tells Marol, “You have any a problem, you come and see Mama.” Later, Marol’s husband unbuttons his shirt, and Marol jumps […]
One day after the service a little boy approached the parish priest with a question: Little Boy: “Father I heard you once say that we all came from dust” Parish priest, “That’s right I did say that”. Little boy: “And Father I heard you say that when we die we […]
Paddy bought a donkey from a farmer for £100. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. In the morning he drove up and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news. The donkey’s died.” Paddy replied, “Well just give me my money back then.” The farmer […]
A young woman was taking golf lessons and had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse for medical assistance. The golf pro saw her heading back and said, “You are […]
An elderly husband and wife visit their doctor when they begin forgetting little things. Their doctor tells them that many people find it useful to write themselves little notes. When they get home, the wife says, “Dear, will you please go to the kitchen and get me a dish of […]
The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” He doesn’t hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he’s standing just a few feet away […]
When a woman found out that she was pregnant, she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news. One day later that week, she took her 4 year old son, Sam, out shopping. A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby. “Yes”, he said. […]
A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional advice. “What kind of toy would you suggest giving a little boy on his third birthday?” she asked. “First I’d have to know more about the child,” the psychologist hedged. The woman took a […]
Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with. JUDGE: “Do you want to live with your mother?” BABY RAPTOR: “No! She beats me.” JUDGE: “OK, then you can live with your father.” BABY […]
A little boy was so exited because his mom told him he is getting a baby brother. He repeated that to his techer every day, when he came to school, “Im getting a brother.” One day his mom alllowed him to feel the baby’s kicks in her belly. The next […]
