An alcoholic walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman
seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him
silly. He immediately apologized and explained, “I’m sorry. I thought you were my wife.
You look exactly like her.” “Why you worthless, stupid, no good drunk!” she screamed.
“Funny,” he muttered, “you even sound exactly like her.”