A LADY OF DISHWASHING

Our general tendency for unification often restricts our imagination to such an extent that we become unable to think in terms of opposites. We can hardly imagine that rich people were once poor, old and young, sad and happy and so on. We start from a static, firm, unchangeable world. There is nothing to shake on this principle. It is therefore an ironic principle of this view that empires have always been rich and thus fundamentally evil and corrupted. Since the mouse bites from no thread! Our self-made mental restriction leads us straight into the narrowness of thinking in prejudice. So every possibility of change or even development, even if only recognizable in the beginning, strictly rejected and denied. But that is not honorable basic faith, or reliability, not even stubbornness, that is already boundless stupidity of the trick!
We simply lack the necessary mental flexibility. 
If somebody, whom we only know as well-educated, well-behaved, and with exemplary manners, misbehaves, it is up to his next reaction, or ours, to see and evaluate such an event. When I was young, it sometimes happened at a society that older men loud and clearly audible “let a drive”, and then immediately say: “Excuse me, old war suffering!” This was followed by a laughter of those present, the tension was resolved, the mood was splendid, and the evening was saved.
Our story here is far more harmless. The heroine told it herself. It was for a long time the last day for Mrs. Lydia S. in the posh world in Flims, the posh and fashionable tourist resort in Grisons in Switzerland. She had visited her daughter Annie, who was training in Zurich, and then she had spent three days in Flims, in a pension that was barely affordable. She took her meals at one of the many on-site restaurants. Swiss cuisine inspired them with their quality.
But nevertheless, on the last day of her presence, she wanted to treat herself to something very special, something unique: a lunch at the “Waldhaus”, a five-star hotel, which even at that time belonged to the group of “leading hotels of the world”. In fact, it was one of the very first homes in the world. She did not know if there would ever be another opportunity for such a chance to taste luxury for a second time in her life. Accordingly, the prices were. But Mrs. Lydia thought that was perfectly fine. Extraordinary things and events justify an extraordinary price.
She too was an extraordinary woman. I remember her when I was a kid. She was a housekeeper and housekeeper at the director of the large local power plant. About everything else was kept silent. At that time, the living conditions in the countryside with its relentless morality were so jammed. In addition, when I was a child, I realized that she had a great talent for doing several things at the same time, with full concentration: at an invitation, she received the guests, prepared the food, played games with the children, had a conversation with the adults, looked after and cared for the old mother of her boss, who was already a nursing case at that time and went to the kitchen from time to time, to see the state of the food. Today we call such amazing skills a talent for multitasking. Her parents’ home had been a big farm. So she had learned early in her youth to pack properly. Later, after leaving home, she had married a host who ran a large inn. Unfortunately he died very early. Now she had to prove herself on her own with her little daughter. Since her talent could develop magnificently. She became a landlady with body and soul. After a few years, her brother-in-law took over the inn, she sent her daughter to study in Switzerland, and began her new job. And so it came about that a farmer’s daughter from Hundersingen, high above the Danube, “from the Swabian Albra”, suddenly came to lunch in Flims in one of the world’s most prestigious hotels. Today, this is a matter of course. At that time, however, this was still an extraordinary event, which also demanded a corresponding appearance. I’m talking about the outfit.
She had gone to the hairdresser and had a modern hairstyle, with the appropriate perm. Her best costume was just good enough, with high heels, a matching, wide-brimmed, elegant hat and evening gloves that reached to the elbows. She had also applied the matching lipstick, and was discreetly perfumed. Ironically, she herself said that she had entered the hotel Waldhaus in combat dress with full war paint, so to speak had “floated in” in an appropriate presentation; Today one would say “hochgestylt”.
Accordingly, the reaction of the guests present in the dining room fell out. She was immediately the focus of interest. After all, she was also a strikingly elegant appearance. Especially some gentlemen who sat alone at their tables tried to attract their attention. One at the next table began to flirt directly with her. When the waiter brought her the menu, she picked and ordered. Unfortunately, I forgot what she had chosen. But it had to have been wonderful, because she was, even in memory, always in raptures about it. After ordering, the big wait began. The aperitif made you hungry. And she, though herself a landlady, learned again the first lesson of top gastronomy: ALCOHOL BEFORE DINING INCREASES THE HUNGER FEELING. HOW APPETITES ARE AFFECTED. The glass was empty. The food was still waiting. So she ordered another aperitif, the second lesson, so to speak: LET YOUR GUESTS WAIT FOR EATING TO SHORTLY BEFORE BEGINNING. By now she had almost forgotten her flirtatious partner from the next table because she was so hungry. He continued to watch her with amusement. After all, When she thought she was already in the hunger delirium, the hall door opened and her food was brought. She thought she had hallucinations when she saw how tiny the portion on the plate was. But there were at least 3 waiters in action, who took care of them. And she experienced the third lesson: TU ALWAYS TOO LITTLE ON THE PLATE, THE GUESTS DO NOT ALLOW SATISFIED SATISFACTION.
And then she ate. And right at the first bite there was a loud bang in her head, she was suddenly in another world, full of bliss. Inwardly, she uttered a loud cry of delight, followed by a roaring moan, which turned into a continuous whimper. Everything inside. No one heard, though she was not sure. And this was her fourth lesson: DO ALL YOUR COOKING KNOWLEDGE AND COOK SO GOOD THAT THE GUEST IS IN THE CONDITION OF COMPLETE DELAY. At the second bite, she noticed that tasted even better than the first one. Her sense of taste was not dulled at all. On the contrary, the taste sensation increased with each bite. Gradually, she became ecstatic, each time more. The rest of the already meagerly calculated portion melted alarmingly, he was getting smaller. Finally, the plate was empty, but the desire for food was still there. – What to do? Madame Lydia considered. “My plate is empty, but it was so good that I still do not have enough of it. But if I order now again, then I can never again look here. In such a sophisticated environment, you simply do not afford to be consumed. That does not fit here. “
So the temptation was averted. – At least for the time being. And yet: Hmm – well – my plate is empty. When it rinses it is then still clean, and no one can see more, what wonderful food once lay on it – just a pity. Hmmm – You have to make sure that nobody is watching. ” 
Slowly she lost her composure. “But I can not do that under the table, it’s obvious, and what do I do then? – On the other hand, if I get caught, that is extremely embarrassing – BUT – I’m not from here, I’m a foreigner, just have no manners, or even better, in my home rule other customs. LIVING THE DIVERSITY OF THE CULTURES! ” 
And after a short while: 
” Damn it, now I just do it! ” 
She looked around furtively, though no one was looking at her. 
And then it happened: IN THE DINING ROOM OF ONE OF THE BEST HOTELS IN THE WORLD SASSING AN ELEGANT LADY AT THE TABLE,
PLAY YOUR PLATE WITH BOTH HANDS IN FACE – 
AND LICKED IT AGAIN. Done! Almost triumphantly, she set the spotless plate back on the table. Then the gentleman from the next table waved to her: “I am very glad that you enjoyed it so much with us!” He was the owner of the hotel. Mrs. Lydia stopped breathing. She thought about what was better now, explaining that she was ashamed of herself, or was about to collapse dead at the table. The main thing, she had eaten wonderful! Or maybe she just dreamed it up and woke up from a nightmare. She squeezed her arm hard. It hurt a lot, but nothing else happened. So the situation was real. When there was no mouse hole left to crawl into, she decided to bravely step forward and apologize for her faux pas. But it turned out differently. Just as she started to speak, the grotesque comedy of the whole scene came to her senses, and she had an overwhelming desire to laugh, and she burst out, snorting and coughing, shaking with laughter. The hotel owner came with us. Finally, both laughed so loud and persistent that the other guests looked at them a bit strangely. They had not noticed anything about the whole situation before.
As Mrs Lydia reported, she was often at the Hotel Waldhaus in Flims, always dining excellently and always a welcome guest. (Oddly enough, the International Hotel and Restaurant Association has not yet come up with the idea of ​​marketing this incident by publishing it for publicity purposes.) 
When she told this story, she asserted that this was the most embarrassing moment in her entire life I never believed her to be so ashamed, because when primitive instincts break loose, breaking through a relapse into primitive human thinking and patterns of behavior, it always provokes serenity, and
WHO LAUGHES SO HEAVENLY IN SUCH A SITUATION, HE DOES NOT NEED TO BURN THAT, AND HAS ALTHOUGH TO KNOW NOT HIDING BEHIND ANY SUSPECTIVE OLD WAR WARRANTIES! 
MADAME, YOU HAVE BRILLIANTLY LISTED: 
ABOUT PEACEFUL THAT HAS BEEN A SELF-TALKING, THAT IS SOVEREIGN! 
EXACTLY TO FEED THEN FOR SUPERIOR ENTERTAINMENT AND HEALTH, SO THAT NEVER COMES BELIEVING, AND THAT THE DAY REMAINS IN MEMORY, THAT IS AN ART! 
THANK YOU VERY MUCH! 
A SHINY ENTERTAINER IS LOST TO YOU!

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