A driver was pulled over for speeding. The cop approaches and says, “Do you know how fast you were going?”
The driver replies, “Yeah yeah, make it quick; I just robbed a bank and I just lost those cops a few miles back.”
“Really?” as the cop starts taking notes, “All by yourself?”
“Nah, I had a partner but I shot him! He’s in the trunk; I also have to smuggle the 20kg of cocaine next to him soon, so can you just please hurry up?”
“Yah, I’m calling for backup”
The cop takes the driver’s keys and puts him in handcuffs; 10 minutes later, two squad cars each with a pair of officers arrive and inspect the man’s vehicle. They kept looking and looking, but they can’t find the money, corpse, nor the cocaine.
One of the latter cops, the sergeant, goes to the driver to apologize.
“I’m sorry to inconvenience you sir; but our man told us you robbed a bank, killed a man, and was about to smuggle coke.”
“What?! I assure you that a God-fearing man like me will never do any abhorrent deed.”
“Yes, our mistake.”
“I bet that bastard also said I was speeding!”