A man walks into a bar with an octopus under it’s arm . They make their way up to the bar where the man sets the octopus down on a stool.
The bartender (Doug) says “Damn, not another one. Ok, what can your animal do?”
Steve replies “You get a lot of talented animals do you? Well, Gropey can play any musical instrument known to man”
Doug says, “Ok, let’s see a sample of what he’s got, and we’ll make a deal”
Steve turns to Gropey, points to the piano across the room, and simply says “Play”. Gropey excitedly hops off the stool, waddles across the room, hops onto the piano
bench and plays Mozart like you’ve never heard him played before.
“Well”, says Doug, “Your drinks are free as long as Gropey here can in fact play every instrument given him, if not, you’ll have to pay the tab at the end.”
Steve agrees.
The crowd is amazed, and a young lady comes up to Gropey and hands him her violin. Gropey grabs the violin and plays The Chaconne from Sonata No. 2 in D minor with
such precision it brings tears to the young lady’s eyes.
The crowd is now enthused. They bring Gropey instrument after instrument, which he plays beautifully.
Finally, after a few hours (and several free beers), the crowd is out of instruments, and Gropey lays down on the floor.
“Well,” says Steve, “Guess my drinks are on the house”
Doug, a little worried about paying the large tab, says “There’s got to be something, hang on a sec” and heads into the back. After several minutes of banging and a little
cursing, Doug emerges with a smile on his face and tosses something into the middle of the floor.
Bagpipes. Gropey is all over them, wraps his arms around them and starts rolling around on the floor.
After a few minutes, Doug triumphantly says “Well I guess we finally stumped him. That’ll be $84.50”
To which Steve replies “Hang on, as soon as he figures out he can’t f*ck it, he’ll play it”