A TV crew goes down to a farmer to explore how a day in the countryside unfolds. They ask him to describe how his day goes.
Well, I get up in the morning, and I have a shot of moonshine…
Hold on, hold on, this won’t do!! We can’t tell our viewers that you’re drinking first thing in the morning. You know what, say that you get up and read the newspaper.
There you go!
Alright, I get up in the morning, and I read the newspaper. I feed the pigs, and then I read another newspaper. In the morning, I’m out in the workshop, and I read two or
three books. For lunch, I read two magazines, then I walk around the estate, reading another book. In the evening, I bring in the animals, and then I read the evening
newspaper. After that, I would go to the library, but it’s only open until ten, so then we go over to my buddy Joe’s place, ’cause he’s got a printing press…