A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, “I almost had an
affair with another woman.” The priest said, “What do you mean, almost?” The
Irishman said, “Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.” The
priest said, “Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re not to see that
woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box.” The
Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box.
He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching,
quickly ran over to him saying, “I saw that. You didn’t put any money in the poor box!”
The Irishman replied, “Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you,
that’s the same as putting it in!”