A man leaves a bar, gets into his car and drives away.
A mile down the road, he’s stopped by a police officer.
The officer walked up to the driver’s side window holding a Breathalyzer and said:
“Good evening sir. We’re testing for drunk driving. Would you please blow into this machine?”
The man says: “Sorry officer, but I can’t do that. I have asthma. If I blow in that machine, I will get out of air.”
“Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample”, said the officer.
“I can’t do that. I have anemia and if you stick a needle in me I will bleed to death.”
“Well, then we need a urine sample.”
“I’m sorry officer, I can’t do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I’ll get really low blood sugar.”
“Alright… then you’ll have to get out and walk 5 yards along this white line.”
“I can’t do that either, officer.”
The officer was getting irritated… “And why not?”
“Because I’m dead drunk.”