Day: August 5, 2019

George W. Bush has a heart attack and dies. He is sent straight to hell where the devil is already waiting for him. “I do not know what to do,” says the devil, “You’re on my list, but I do not have a spare room left, so you definitely have […]

When you sweat, the skin is leaking and the water seeps out. When babies are still very small, the mommies have them in the stomach. They can not be stolen. What will become of men in heaven, when the angels are all women? I was born on the 27th of […]

Good evening, my dear viewers. I would like to welcome you to the program ‘You and your Lokus’ from our series ‘The Loo, the Unknown Being’. Today we are talking about the proper use of the locally affectionately called ‘shitty house’. Before we visit it, we need to be aware […]

The class teacher introduces the class to a new student, Sakiro Suzuki (the son of Sony’s CEO). The hour begins. Class teacher: “Let’s see who controls American cultural history, who said: Give me freedom or death.” Mousestill in class, Suzuki raises his hand: “Patrick Henry 1775 in Philadelphia” Very good, […]

A situation that can hardly be uglier. You sit comfortably at the tastefully arranged dinner, think about the origins of Brussels sprouts, look forward to a relaxing evening in the circle of your potato chips and think otherwise nothing dramatic, as they suddenly perceive an indistinct rattling. A quick appeal […]

Hospital death certificate: Name: Bill Gates Time: Shortly after the release of WinDoc 10.0 (“Windows for Doctors”, V10.0) Cause of death: General malfunction in HERZ_LUNG_MASCHINE.EXE caused by TETRIS.EXE – All processes stopped. Restart with Ctrl + Alt + Del Backup not found: (A) bort, (R) etry, (P) anic? Keyboard not […]

Typing: The Internet Woman: You have to pay to get access to her. The server woman: She is always busy when you need her. The Windows Woman: You know she has many mistakes, but you can not live without her. The Powerpoint Woman: It is ideal for presenting to people […]

A wisdom from the Dakota Indians says, “If you discover that you are riding a dead horse, get off.” But in professional life we ​​often try other strategies according to which we act in this situation: We get a stronger whip. We change the riders. We say, “That’s how we […]

if you pay the rates of your new car with returnable bottles! if you can act as a fire breather without first taking a sip of alcohol! if you are greeted by all the first-line pennants on your way to your office! when the wine festival of your hometown is […]

“Good day, ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, and we are glad that you have given us your trust and have come aboard, among us you see the expanse of the ocean, on the left the small island, and dense next to it, directly under the burning wing, the little […]